Jesus' Pieces

This tattoo is on a guy named Jeremy, whom I met in a bowling alley in Buffalo, NY.
I hated him from the moment I saw him. He had this tiny little (unnecessary) ponytail, and was wearing a US flag shirt, with track-suit pants. My hatred went beyond his choices in haberdashery and hairdo, however, when he started to brag about his backpiece, after he saw my tattoos.

I asked him to show it to me, and he did, proudly.

I asked him "Is that supposed to be Jesus? Or Shaggy?"
He answered "Jesus."
"Well, why does he have a black eye?"
"That is shading" he replied.
"Why does he have one eyebrow that grows down his nose?"
"That is the side of his nose...not his eyebrow."

"Why does his neck have a fur ruffle?"
"Dude..." He was getting pissed, but I was drunk, and didn't give a flying fuck.

"OK, but why does he have shredded lettuce on his head?"

Extra deduction for punching me really hard.

What this tattoo says about the wearer:

I think that Jesus spoke English.



  1. My 6th grade daughter could draw a better picture of Jesus than that but I can't imagine anyone having something permanently attached to their body by an incompetent tattoo artist. Great find and I'm still laughing.

  2. Looks like a Picasso/Jesus with some spinach on the head for good measure!

  3. HAHAHA. This is my first time here and I'm digging it. This looks like anime Jesus with a lazy eye. Cheers to letting your 9 year old nephew do your tattoos!

  4. LOL That has got to be the worst Jesus tattoo ever. I'm with you, I think it's Shaggy. Dude, I thought I was going to spew Pepsi when I read why you were giving an extra deduction. :D

  5. why are you so full of bullshit, captain dick, you certainly live up to your dumb ass name,this guy lives in the uk..england. i should know its my brother, don't know where you stole the pic from but its because of DICKS like you that the can fuck up the internet and cause much stress to unfortunate people, the tattoo is now covered with a better tattoo and looks much better.
    so fuck you asshole.

  6. oh and as for the above comment, well mr anonymous is name dave... aka big jarma.

    again fuck you, dick head

  7. put your tattoos on here then dumbshit lets have a laugh at yours