Swanson Warrior

This guy used to drink in my bar. I don't know his real name--he had big nostrils, like Babe Ruth, so we called him 'Chunnel'. He was a lousy tipper.

So, Chunnel, heard you got a new piece. Let's see it.
(Proudly) OK, check it out. kind of a warrior...sort of Boba Fett meets an Aztec warrior...with Moon Boot-sandals.
No, it is from "Spartan Warrior"...the game.

Oh. Why does he carry the big pie?
Pie? That is his shield.

It looks just like a pot-pie...It even has the crimping around the edge of the crust.
It is a shield, that has been through battle. See? Those are battle scars.

No, they are the "one inch slits in crust, to allow steam to vent."
(no response)

Is HE the Pie-man from Simple Simon? I always pictured him as being a lot less mean, ya know? Kind of chubby and happy.

I like his skirt, though.
Fuck you, man.

Extra deduction for leaving before I could do any Sparta/Spartan jokes. Wuss.

What this tattoo says about the wearer:

I sure do like pie.



  1. The man teats are all pushed to one side. The guy should see a doctor.

  2. you iz a funny muthfucka, muthafucka! Pie, huh huh!

  3. I wonder what kind of pie it is. That is classic...well, not that the other tats you've shared haven't been, but this one...well, takes the pie (ouch).

  4. WTF? I'm not sure that guy could even get an amputation to cure that tat. I mean the fucking docs would be soooo hysterical they couldn't do the job.

  5. hilarious! I love it!

  6. Check out my post today. I have a tattoo you might enjoy!

  7. If he likes pie,that might be a huge hit for the ladies.All women like a pie eating man!

  8. LMAO Oh man, would've loved to hear/see those Spartan jokes.

  9. Judging by the "warriors" wearer i'm guessing this was a chicken pot pie!

  10. I can see Gerard Butler now:

    "THIS...IS...A MRS. BUDDS!!!!"

  11. He is the warrior of cannibus.

    He will pillage your buds and then eat his turkey pot pie.

  12. Where are you? I want more awful, awful tattoos.

  13. LMFAO You are soooo funny! I seriously choked on my Pepsi. Poor guy. You totally deflated him with the whole "pie" thing, but you are totally right -- it looks like pie!

  14. Thanks for the appropriate information about arm
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  15. Easy and cheap! I am so glad we made our own. The only plus side to the Tulip kit is that it comes with body paint, which is fun.

    Original GlitZGlam Glitter Tattoo Kit

  16. Awesome work.Just wanted to drop a comment and say I am new to your blog and really like what I am reading.Thanks for the share

  17. Interesting. Your instructions look clear but I'm not very good at this so I hope this will work well for me. Thanks for the tips!

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